I was gonna post this later but I can be quite impatient sometimes haha. Plus the excitement of meeting all my old friends again in game and meeting those that still remember me (Well done cause you probably have a better memory than me xD most of the time)
I truly believe in that expression, hence why I would live to go back to Africa and live there, especially as I was born there. While Feral-Heart may be more of a Second Home, it still feels like a home to me that no matter how much time I spend away from it, I simply cannot seem to detach myself fully from this community as I have made many a good friend here.
Now I'm not too sure myself for how long I've really been away as some of you may have seen me popping back in once a year or so whenever a close friend asked me to join for a FH event like Halloween or something similar. But if I were to guess it's probably been about 3 years, more or less. not including the rare appearances. So in other words, it's been a while and so I apologize if I don't recognize some of you immediately.
But that's not the Apology I meant in the title. If all members of staff, that were part of the old staff and are still here, could please read this that would be much appreciated. Don't even need to reply.
Now I need to make sure this post is family friendly x'D.. Anywhale.. Now I know I've been quite a butt to a lot of you in the past.. Not only staff members but some of you in the community included. I've done a few things, while being staff and especially that one incident after being staff that got me my first and only ever ban, that I deeply regret. So to anybody I've hurt in the process, I think you know who you are; I am truly sorry and while I don't expect you to accept my apology immediately or hell, even ever. But I want you to know that I've changed as a person since then. So it's probably a good thing I took this long break of absence from FH.
Honestly, the more I think about those stupid things I've done, the more I regret doing them and acting the way I did. I was stupid and quite immature despite my age. I'm also very aware that I've probably lost the trust of a few very good people due to my actions. Good people I still care about although I may never openly admit it about whom I'm talking about. most of these people are now staff so I ask the community to please look out for the staff and help them whenever they may need it. I actually enjoyed my time as staff, alas while it was shortened due to my own stupidity, but it felt like a family within a family. While I wasn't around during the drama that happened recently, I still believe the staff of Feral Heart do an amazing job to keep this place going and even make it warm and cozy for everybody. A LOT has changed since I first joined around the end of 2011 or so, and the changes have so far, been only for the better of this community and game. So a round of applause for all the hard work they do and might I add: Voluntarily! Nobody forces them to do it and it doesn't add a cent into their bank accounts despite the many, sometimes odd, hours they spend. Sometimes being called upon duty in the middle of the night to sort out an urgent issue!
I used to always tell myself I would never let go of grudges against people with whom I've made enemies in the past. But with time I've found out that it's honestly not worth it as some of those enemies made were sometimes due to my own actions. So unless it is somebody who has intentionally and personally set out to try and ruin me, I eventually forgive and forget as I've already done so in the near past. You may know who you are, if you still lurk in this community.. We may never know!
So with these words, I hope some of you can take my example and eventually forgive me for my actions towards you, be it directly or indirectly and/or breaking my trust with you. Just know that at the end of the day, I never mean to hurt anybody. If anything, this community has taught me to accept and be willing to be open minded with a lot of things. In the past, before I even knew what a FH is, I would think of gay people as disgusting.. Now a big part of my closest friends are gay/bi/lesbian/trans etc etc.. And I will forever love them just as they deserve to be and not any differently just because of their personal choices in life.
With all of this, I would just like to announce I am slowly making a come back to this community and game. Although I might not be able to spend as much time in game as I would like because of my job as a zookeeper meaning I have to wake up almost every morning at 5am to drive 45min in traffic to get to work. And all of this 6 times a week. But I will try and be there as much as I can manage. At least as soon as I can sort out why my game doesn't wanna connect to front server. I have made a seperate help post btw, before anybody thinks to reply on this thread about my issue alone.
Can't wait to see you all in game and maybe even keep making new friends! <3
Raphi
