Alright, now before I get started, this is NOT a personal issue I have.
So, a few other users have brought this up recently, whether publicly or in private discussion, and honestly I'm getting tired of it. The blunt point is this:
I feel like everyone's just kissing up to everyone and acting super unnaturally nice, but with no sincerity whatsoever; and the bulk of the community just seems fake to me.
Now, I know what all of you reading are thinking. People are being nice? What's wrong with that? Well, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being polite, or telling white lies, or being friendly. It's just that, the community is based on who can butter up the nicest, and not on other actual good people who may just be too shy or blunt to make a super huge deal and compliment everyone on every little thing. I've seen users with an absolute heart of GOLD been completely overshadowed, regarded as "unfriendly" or "distant," and sometimes even some... rude things in private just because they aren't stereotypically outgoing. This really bothers me to no end.
And yes, I am aware that much of this community is young and the like, but still, if everyone is constantly slammed with compliments and praise, and being blown up for something, then no one's truly special; and it's extremely unfair to people who do something just as well, maybe even better, than those glorified members, but receive little to moderate attention for their dedication. Many of you probably think "well jeez, Twisted, you're just jealous because so and so didn't get as much attention as so and so."
I will admit, I am slightly biased, as many friends of mine were overshadowed in such a way, but this isn't the issue, but a factor in the pic picture.
Now, this big picture, as I mentioned before in the blunt point, is that people don't seem genuine. I am aware this is the internet, and it is difficult to properly decipher tone or feeling through text alone, but still; it can give off some mixed feelings if someone is everyone's sweetheart in public, but rude and or selfish when actually spoken to in a one on one. I personally have been talked down to or "shut up" and "yessed" to death by people I once considered kind.
The thing is, as difficult as it is to get truly caught up and interested in a strictly internet topic, no one seems to care about actual issues users may have and are mentioning, or something they are proud of, but try to act like they're suddenly best friends or glorify the member for the sake of a good reputation. Now this is scarcely viewed as a bad thing at first. It's good to keep up a generally positive reputation, and that is achieved through being kind and considerate, especially to those who need it. It's the right thing to do, right? Well, sometimes a good action for the wrong action could also classify as a bad action, even if only subliminally.
Now, I will admit, I am guilty of this on occasions, but as someone who's been through many of the same issues that people may have, and I'd feel better knowing that I've helped someone. However, many of the people who offer to be a shoulder to cry on are empty offers to seem like they care, however, many I know have been blatantly rejected by those who offered advice or a "safe place" to talk. I know some things are too personal, but if someone truly needs to vent; why offer to comfort them if you're just going to brush them away like it's nothing in private? The answer is simple. Reputation. Everyone just pretends to care about everyone to the ends of the earth when they really couldn't give a rats backside about whether or not the person will benefit, and it's very selfish and it bothers me.
Also, even when assisting those in need, I feel like people are just throwing out the darndest things as random suggestions that may have NOTHING to do with the actual issue, and much of the time make the problem worse. I understand not everyone is an expert, and everyone makes mistakes. However, when people barely read up on the issue and just spit out the same answers in every thread, even if it's already been stated that the said solution did nothing to help the issue, or is unrelated, it's really just... off.
Now, I know many of those reading this may be offended. It's a reasonable response to someone seemingly challenging most of the community. However, I mean nothing personal, and this is not meant as a threat, call-out post, or as a form of attention seeking. I just would like to get this off my chest, and I am curious if others feel the same way.
For those who have made it this far, thank you for your time and patience.
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