Feral Heart

Off topic => Discussion Board => Topic started by: Senrova on October 03, 2017, 10:11:07 pm

Title: How do you help people?
Post by: Senrova on October 03, 2017, 10:11:07 pm
I just read through the rules of this discussion board and I'm not sure if this is too personal or anything...

But when a friend comes to you feeling down about something, how do you help them? What do you say?

I never know what to do or say when people go around saying their depressed or something. It's like feeling powerless and maybe awkward? Pfft, I dunno XD
(I posted a status on dA about this if you wanna check it out? https://swiftyswoo.deviantart.com/status/10736173)
Title: Re: How do you help people?
Post by: Azurain on October 03, 2017, 11:09:12 pm
It's sometimes quite difficult to help out a down friend, especially if you don't exactly know how to handle things. I tend to sometimes be quite awkward in situations such as this, but I just try my best to be there for them and cheer them up with things they like. ^^
Title: Re: How do you help people?
Post by: Senrova on October 04, 2017, 06:43:36 am
Quote from: Azura on October 03, 2017, 11:09:12 pm
It's sometimes quite difficult to help out a down friend, especially if you don't exactly know how to handle things. I tend to sometimes be quite awkward in situations such as this, but I just try my best to be there for them and cheer them up with things they like. ^^
I can't believe I didn't know it was that simple o~o
Title: Re: How do you help people?
Post by: Kuri on October 04, 2017, 09:22:24 am
On the internet i find keeping them distracted works.  Sometimes i give examples of "Person 'X' i know once had that situation and managed to overcome via a mixture of 'methods' " but this sometimes makes them mad as they weren't looking for someone with answers.
Title: Re: How do you help people?
Post by: Lucius on October 04, 2017, 02:08:51 pm
I find myself quite inept in these situations. Whoever would rely on me for emotional support will find themselves sorely disappointed, as I tend to be much more rational instead of emotional. I can understand why a person feels a certain way, but I can't actually be angry or sad with (or for) them, because their situation does not affect mine.

When someone comes to me for support, I usually see a problem and look for a solution, I poke and I prod and all in all, it's because I want to understand the human condition. I'll ask questions like "What led you to feel this way" and this is not usually something a person wants to talk about when upset. Most of the time, they want someone to just be there with them and agree.

Quote from: Kuri on October 04, 2017, 09:22:24 am
Sometimes i give examples of "Person 'X' i know once had that situation and managed to overcome via a mixture of 'methods' " but this sometimes makes them mad as they weren't looking for someone with answers.

Kuri summed it up nicely. People need time to work through emotions by themselves before they become receptive to advice and help. At least, that's what I usually noticed.
Title: Re: How do you help people?
Post by: Senrova on October 04, 2017, 02:28:33 pm
Ay,  I see what you two mean. I'll keep that in mind.