Ouch, take care my dear Accalia,
do try to stay safe and look to those around you to rant to/talk to about current emotions and situations you may be going through, and take their advice if you see it most helpful. Someone like you doesn't deserve such trauma, and I hope you and your mother will be able to pull through it and you'll be able to get more of a relationship with both of your parents again soon. Be safe. <3