Wow... I don't know what to say to this... I don't know rather to praise you for how good this poem is or worry and try to offer advice for how sad and lost you feel to of wrote this dark poem. I guess I will do both... Great poem I have seen a lot of poems but not all of them where this detailed and thought out, though I am sorry your feeling this way and it compelled you to write this very detailed and somewhat depressing poem... There is a saying I live by that I heard in one of my favorite songs "Suffer long and it will set you free" that is the quote that seems to help me when I am going through a rough time. I can relate to how you feel, my self I have been back stabbed by people multiple times in life and most of my girlfriends were kind of cruel to me as well, so I know where you are coming from. No my problems I have had may not be the exact same as your's but they are similar, please hang in there and don't give in even though I know it is hard to do sometimes. Losing love or a friend is not worth your tears nor is it worth your pain, don't let this destroy you. Good luck.