I don't exactly understand, but it seems like you can't see your friend's preset and they can see yours though.
Make sure you put it in your presets folder, not my_presets in case you got. They should be .fhp's too including your usernames. Take this for example:
hugrf2_5.fhp
That's the exported file I have, and I have people download the file and put them in the presets folder which is not my_presets ^^
Also, make sure you restart the game after inserting it, and make sure it's the correct number and username, perhaps even including the caps in the username.
That's for who is having issues with the preset file I guess, and the owner of the preset would have to make it a .fhp if it's not one.
Hope this helped at all.