Author Topic: The Secret of the Orphanage  (Read 1127 times)

wolfgirl56

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The Secret of the Orphanage
« on: September 01, 2012, 12:58:26 am »
~The Secret of the Orphanage~
Crystal Petronela
No, this is not my real name, but it is one of my pen names next to Marianna Petronela. Basically if you kind of think about it, Crystal and Marianna are sisters, though they are one person. Marianna writes the adventure and horror books/parts while Crystal writes human/animal stories with a bit of suspense in them.
Anyways, let's get onto the story, shall we?

Offline morallydefunct

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Re: The Secret of the Orphanage
« Reply #1 on: September 01, 2012, 01:32:57 am »
We shall. :3


>mfw i see internet arguments

wolfgirl56

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Re: The Secret of the Orphanage
« Reply #2 on: September 03, 2012, 05:01:16 pm »
Chapter One
Rrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnngggggg! Yawn. I tossed myself over to look at my alarm clock. "6:30 a.m." it read. I hated getting up at six o'clock in the morning. At least the other girls were lucky; they woke up at 8:30 in the morning while I got up two hours earlier. Ms. Thorn was a firecracker with a short fuse, and she was extremely impatient. Whenever I got into trouble, let's say, like when I broke a window while throwing a teddy bear, she raised my waking-up time ten minutes up.
      Knowing that I had to get up, I walked into the bathroom of my room and took a bath, and then a shower that were only three minutes long. I brushed my teeth, brushed my hair, and got dressed into navy yoga pants and a white T-shirt with a red jacket over it. It was going to become winter pretty soon. When I walked into the kitchen, Ms. Thorn's snake eyes were glaring at me. "What beverage do you want, Ms. Thorn?" I asked her.
     "Coffee, and hurry up, Lucy!"
     "Yes, ma'am."
      As I am making Ms. Thorn's coffee, a mouse dashes across the kitchen floor, causing her to scream. "Lucy! Kill that rat at once!" Obviously, she didn't know about animals. She didn't like them either. To me, she'd probably bathe in a bathtub filled with money like Mr. Krabs on Spongebob Squarepants.
      "Rich -Removed by moderator-," I mutter under my breath.
       "What did you say, Lucy? And hurry up with my coffee!"
        "Nothing, Ms. Thorn." When her coffee is finished, I hand it to her and watch her spit it out. "Decaf, Lucy, decaf!"
« Last Edit: March 12, 2017, 03:54:18 am by Morgra »

Offline Karakuri

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Re: The Secret of the Orphanage
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2012, 01:52:09 am »
This is pretty great! Write more! The one thing I'd have to critique on is the length, but I have that problem sometimes too.
Anonimousity. It's like we're faceless...but with faces. Do I even logic?

wolfgirl56

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Re: The Secret of the Orphanage
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2012, 08:02:25 pm »
Thanks for the comment and feedback. =D