Overbearing Roleplayers

[shiftyglob]

"Its my role play you have to do what I want, its my role play you have to say what I want."

Recently I have run into several people who are very controlling when it comes to role play... Not when I join in someone else's role play group (I don't join groups), but when someone joins my group or a friend decides to role play with me (and my sisters, since we're kind of a package deal), they hardly ever like how I (or we) play, and then they try to take over. It could be my group, or maybe my friend came up to me to role play, but then instead of letting me play my characters how I want, they start going 'no, you have to follow my pairing' or 'your character should come up and do ----'. Even though my characters would never do what they want them to. And I don't do 'pairings' or 'shipping', I even tell them no, but they either keep pushing it or leave in a huff. I've seen them do it to other people too, they never let anyone else do anything unless it fits 'their story', otherwise they ignore it or call someone out on it. And I don't mean calling someone out on power playing (because that is a valid argument in my opinion, as long as you keep it civil and don't insult them because of it), but when they get onto you for how you play your character, like they're an expert and know what's best or something.
It doesn't matter if the character I'm playing is a 'cosplay' character or my own original one. They come up to me to role play with my character, but then they decide the character I am playing doesn't fit into their story or what ever and either try to force me to do what they want, or leave like I just insulted their mother (since I don't change my characters for other people, seeing as I made it for myself). Sometimes the people who do this are the nicest people you can run into outside of role play, but I don't know if they take role play to seriously or what, but once they start roleplaying, they become a control freak.

Has this ever happened to you, have you caught yourself doing it to someone, what is your opinion on these types of people, How do you deal with these situations, etc?

[Lady_Alizarin]

It hasn't happened to me too often, and I would never be pushy like that to someone who wants to have fun roleplaying. I don't really like people who get pushy in a roleplay and start demanding that your character follows their standards. Really, it takes the fun out of a roleplay. I'm glad none of the friends I roleplay with are like that.

I've roleplayed with a few pushy people at one time... a long time ago. I don't roleplay with them anymore since they would start demanding me and other roleplayers to do things that we weren't comfortable with. When things got so out of hand I pretty much said, "DONE! I'm through with this. I'm outta here" and just left.

[WolfQueen]

Roleplay should be free enough that any character could interact with the other. Group Roleplay should have some standards, but not to the point that you have to make a character perfect by the leader's demand. It's just how roleplay is. If the leader is demanding someone to change their character to fit their roleplay that hard doesn't make the members roleplay, it makes the leader's roleplay. No fun, isn't it? Roleplay should be fun for all that enjoy, not a singular person.

I had this experience when I used to roleplay often in-game. When I tried to join a warrior cat roleplay, they demanded me to crate a different character because my pelt colors wasn't their preference. Same thing happened in Animal Jam a couple of years ago. I was a white wolf trying to join a roleplay, but they wanted me to change my coat because they didn't like all white.

What the problem is with demanding someone to make a new character for a roleplay is that the new character would be rushed and have shallow attributes. No one likes those type of characters unless they are amateur roleplayers.

[Twin]

I have this problem quite often. e_e Honestly though I think people who make their characters so that they won't interact with others it's annoying. Seriously. Did people make their characters to just sit in the corner? Don't cry when you keep pushing my character away and I stop roleplaying with you. It's a group effort, and people are such limelight hogs it's ridiculous. "MAKE THIS RP INTO A FANFICTION ABOUT MY CHARACTER PLZ". -prepares knife-.

[Vespian]

Roleplay should be free enough that any character could interact with the other. Group Roleplay should have some standards, but not to the point that you have to make a character perfect by the leader's demand. It's just how roleplay is. If the leader is demanding someone to change their character to fit their roleplay that hard doesn't make the members roleplay, it makes the leader's roleplay. No fun, isn't it? Roleplay should be fun for all that enjoy, not a singular person.

Perfectly said Ms. Kelsey. I couldn't agree more with that statement.

I too have experienced these "pushy" individuals. While I won't go into precise detail, there was one occurrence when a friend of mine and I joined a role-play and after a while, said friend got promoted to a high rank. Next thing I know, I find the leader of the establishment bossin' her around, tellin' her who to promote, who to order around and why, etc (not IC-wise, which would have been more understandable, but OOC-wise). This didn't happen for very long for the day I found out, we both left the group and never looked back. In spite of bein' the creator of the role-play, that does not give one the right to boss around her/his subordinates via OOC and expect everythin' to run smoothly with no revolt. Like Ms. Kelsey stated herself, doin' somethin' along those lines isn't role-playin'. Yeah, perhaps for one or two people but the rest are mere pawns to provide entertainment. That isn't the fair way to role-play and when I encounter individuals who attempt at bossin' I or others around, I merely fail to allow myself to join the role-play altogether.

[Crin]

I think it really depends on the situation and RP. I mean I've definitely been in those sorts of RPs where I've seen that happen and avoid doing it myself as much as possible. Still, like I said, I've seen it go both ways depending on the RP itself. Sometimes RP leaders are very strict because they have an exact plot they want to follow, and while it doesn't provide much free choice, it does keep the story. Then I've seen joining members get overly pushy, and while it creates a lot of individual freedoms and choices, I've seen RPs both flourish and fail under those conditions.

Not that I'm saying it's a good idea to like join a RP and try to commandeer it. Interesting as it may end up being - still is rather rude.

[nubeees]

I have most certainly seen this around, and admit to being that way myself once or twice. >.< (My bad)
Thank you for pointing this out Shifty!

[Killian]

I haven't had this much, but I was in a crazy group where the owner would get jealous if he saw you in another group and he'd whisper you saying "Are you going to be coming on today or is that group going to take up all your time?" and if you were just on doing nothing for a bit "You're not doing anything so you can come on your group character!". Really possessive like that. Once I threatened to leave and he actually said "I thought you were one of the guys I could trust..". It was never JUST a group for that kid. Glad to say I did leave that group but I miss all the friends I made there.

[rustheart]

I never had it happen to me but my friend has had this happen to her.  There were two packs that were going to combine even though both packs had literally just finished murdering each other.  Her character would not just sit back and watch this happen so she intervened.  The people first told her to shut up and basically sit in the corner.  When she didn't they ignored her.  In the end the packs did not go together and everyone blamed her, even outside of the roleplay.

[Wizardmymom]

Hmm.. I have seen this happen.

Honestly, I agree with everyone when it comes down to what they've said.
It takes the fun out of the RP, and nothing becomes interesting anymore.
I love to make groups, and I often give little ideas to my members on what to RP, but it's up to them to use it or not.

For Example:

I have Bestia Magia.
I was joking with my members about this picture I found, that looks exactly like my character and someone else's character hugging.
After a "careful and civilized" conversation, we decided to have that happen.

I didn't go "Now this WILL happen."
That takes all the fun out of it.
RP is about enjoying yourself with friends and letting your creativity loose.
While restrictions are placed on how far you can go with that (some RPs more then others), it's still a time to have fun.
People who run around with the Leader's Stick and point it at everyone, telling them to do this and not that in the RP isn't fair, nor interesting.


It's like if you're at recess or lunch break and your friends are asking you to play a game.
You accept, and suddenly they're acting as if they have complete control of you.
Andthisiswheremyphilosophersidecomesoutandgoes'whydowefeardisobeying?'

Anyways, it just takes everything out of the game.
In my opinion, this is almost the same as the Over-Used Admin/Leader trick, or the I'm-a-mod-so-you-MUST-listen-to-me trick.