Why...?

[Azurain]

Why? She asks herself everyday...as she's constantly reminded of her mistakes. Oh....how she wishes she could turn the time back and fix it all. Or better yet...avoided the circumstances that led her here in the first place.

She sits under the tree...watching the others....watching as they sit in their groups...chatting....loving....she has others around her...but....they aren't them.

She scans the crowd. Finds them. There they are. With their new group. Happy. Laughing. Part of something that they can be proud of. Accepted... She could have had all that too. But instead....she let anger and stupidity get the best of her.

And now...she has to live with these mistakes. She's known about it for a very long time. Ever since the first rejections came. But now....to be basically rejected by the one she always thought would stick by her the longest?

It's the cruelest blow. The worst part of her punishment. And it's all her fault. She allowed something so small....get in the way of a wonderful thing.

But it's just another part of the lesson she must learn.

She's upset. Oh she's upset. She wants to lash at the people who took them. Although the rational part of her mind says "This is YOU...not THEM!" It doesn't soothe the ache and bitterness.

She wonders why she is even still here. She leaves but always comes back? What is the reason? No...the reason? She's following false hope. Thinking that things may get better. Imagining they are. That everything gets better magically....that they come back...that she's accepted again....

However that is not for her. Because she's still being punished. She still must learn.

She's not wanted.

She's a reject.

An outcast.

Untrustworthy.

No matter what they say...no matter what ANYONE says....

She knows the truth...that she will ALWAYS be judged.

And that's the cruelest lesson of all.

She can't redeem herself. They have passed their judgement and deemed her not good enough.

And for the rest of the time here.

She has to face that.

She can't take much more, but they are glad to keep shaming her.

And showing her the result...of breaking everything she had going for her.

[Melon]

Lovely story, and the concept of it is just great.

I felt for the character in the story.


10/10 would read again

[TruthOfTheMt.]

I know this is a very old post, and you, the author, may not be on here anymore, but I really felt for your story. Would like to hear the details behind it all.... Take care Love. <3