Argh, all these stories.. brings back memories.
I'm sorry to hear that story Sylph, it sucks to
loose a friend, yes indeedy.
I had a best friend. We went to the same school, saw each other everyday. But we talked more
online. Why? Because she was the "it" gurl and apparently it was embarrassing to talk to normal
girls, like myself. But at that time, i didn't care about it. We were really close, we'd talk
everyday after school, online. It was really fun, we talked about the most random things ever. At
school we wouldn't hang out as much, but i was always there for her. Always.
One day, she completely ignored me. When she went online, she wouldn't talk to me. I talked to her,
but she wouldn't reply. It went on for a week. I confronted her about it. But she wouldn't say or do
anything, she just fell silent. Like i wasn't even there. I walked off feeling like the biggest idiot out. After that day i had gone completely insane, i wouldn't talk to anyone, i'd beat someone up. Maybe it was puberty hitting me like a ton of bricks, who knows.
I did a lot of horrible things to her as well. Verbally. I called her a lot of things, names and all. Then we
just hated each other for a long long time. I began to miss her. I spent my nights crying about her and staring at the phone, wondering if i should call her and say i was sorry. But i didn't, i was too afraid, she probably hates me like hell, i thought. Eventually, i realized how awful i've been to others. I apologized to everyone that i've hurt, besides her. I moved on and made some other friends, but i still thought about her every now and then, still cry myself to sleep every now and then.
At the beginning of the year she talked to me online. She apologized. That was totally unexpected. I was so happy. She told me that she missed me and that she was sorry for ignoring me. I was so friggin happy. She called me and we started screaming over the phone, telling each other we're sorry and stuff, crying haha Dx
So now, we're okay. But we'll never be the same again, we'll never be best friends again. And it just kills. I can't talk to her in real life, at all. I try, but words never come out, i just feel this sickening guilt twisting about in my stomach. Brings me back to when we hated each other. Even now i STILL cry about her. Sigh. But yes, friends come and go, all the time. It's sad, but we learn to move on.